Well, all my sports teams again fully underwhelmed me. The #1 player in the world lost today to some guy who is like ranked 33, the Twins needed the help of the Indians (shudder) to win, and the Saints didn't even play. For those of you wondering why I hate the Indians, here is a little history. Two years ago, after being the worst team in major league baseball for 8 years, the Twins started to win. They would have won the division too, except that the Indians beat them 15 times that season, ensuring that we would not make the playoffs. Tonight though, they gave us sole possession of 1st place, because they are in the process of sweeping the Royals, so we will have a half game lead on them. (for up to the minute scoring, go to mlb.com.) Do not worry though, it will soon evaporate. Witness Sundays game. Men on first and secong. No one out. So the runner gets picked off second, because the batter misses the bunt. On a fastball. Pathetic. Okay, so now there is a man on first and one out. So you think double play ball. On no, the baseball gods want to prolong the agony. So the guy hits a double, and the runner tries to score from first. Oh wait, he's out at the plate. Bad news. Yeah. Thankfully, the Twins managed to win, just because the Brewers are more inept then us. Whatever.
To politics, though, and again, nothing happened. Really, it is just boring. I mean, I know that Bush is getting elected again. Interesting enough though, there was an interesting letter to the editor today. Note: We have two papers here, the liberal one and the socialist one. The Socialist one hates Israel, Bush, and the forces of good. They endorsed Gore to win. The liberal one (actually, they are supposed to be conservative, but they ain't) hates Israel, Bush, and the forces of good. They were too woosy to endorse Bush. On their letter pages, the socialist one only had Bush bashers. Oh same thing as the liberal one. Why? because they believe that they should give everyone a chance to get published.
So anyway, the letter in the liberal writer in the liberal organ responds valiantly to a saturday op-ed which called Bush a "right extremist". This guy says that our great leader is actually, in his words, a "socialist." I am not kidding.
Well, another blog is done. bye bye
Both the Twins and the Saints had big late inning comebacks, and now they are both in first place. Other then that, you can go to their respective websites for more news. In other sporting news, the British A team defeated the US Eagles in rugy by some ridiculous score in the finals of the Churchill Cup. It isn't really something to be proud of though, because no one here actually cares about rugby scores. Well actually, some people do, and I am not mentioning their names.
If you read this yesterday, you would know that I had failed to read the Peanuts from Saturday. Well, I forgot last night, but I read it today and it was worth it. You can do it too, at peanuts.com.
Not too much politics to report today, but maybe I will have something tommorow.
Remember to pray for Andre vs Mark. I mean, pray that Andre wins.
You know how I know that it is late? When the Peanuts website displays the next days cartoon. This is kind of annoying, because I can't read yesterdays without closing this, which means that I will probably forget about it. Nu, I'll live. So anyway, the Twins finally won a game, 5-2 over the alchohol-inspired Milwaukee team, which is a good thing. Saints lead off man Cory Harris had his hitting-streak stopped, but he holds the record now by one game, which too is a good thing. In tennis, Andre survived over Younes El Ayanoui, (I think that that is the right spelling) which means that he'll face some guy with a weird name on Monday. Come to think about it, most of them have weird names. Anyway, I will write more tommorow, as I am kind of tired. Au Revoir, John Buchan's saviour.
Who is that you ask? Well, Greenmantle. Read the book.
Well, another day has passed, Andy Roddick won, and I hae virtually nothing to write. Sorry. Anyway, is anyone looking forward to a Roddick-Agassi final? I predict Andre in a 5th set tie-breaker 17-15. That would be one for the ages. But who am I kidding? It won't go passed 10-8. Or will it? Anyway, have a great weekend, read me again real soon. Like try late saturday night.
And so, another long summer day comes to a close. The Saints won, the Twins lost, I still have no idea about Cory Harris' hit streak, and um, what's new? Well, Agassi won his second round match versus some guy with a weird name, and if he can advance to at least the quarters, he should have enough points to be ranked number 1. Venus also won, but I go for her because she's an American; anyone who can't face a crowd when you're making the kind of money that she is should be reevaluating their goals in life. The French may be horrid and have no class, but that's not an excuse for garnering sympathy from the British when you are in the midst of slaughtering another hapless opponent. Also, have you noticed that Jennifer Capriati is still Miss Capriati? Even though she is married? don't ask.
To politics, where Senator Strom Thurmond passed away today, at the age of 100. The one time Democrat, he switched to being on the right side (in so many ways) of the aisle in the 60s. More at www.somenewssite.com.
The Supreme Courts decision to overturn the Texas gay law is a very interesting one. Normally, Republicans support increased rights, and less government oversite. However, due to the Christian right, they oppose gays. This ruling, on the one hand, makes libertarians happy, and on the other, calls into serious doubt the statement on our coinage, "In G-d We Trust." Which god? If of the old testament, then gays are banned. In fact, homosexuality is punishable by death under Jewish law. On the other hand, if it is the liberal god who says, "god is made in mans image, as opposed to man being made in Gods", then it makes perfect sense. Call me a prude, but not something worse. Have a good day tommorow, work hard, be strong, don't listen to NPR, (Pledging going on right now,) and remember to always eat before you starve to death.
For almost 100 days, I have kept you, my reading public, informed about life, the universe, and sports. Oh, sorry about repeating myself. Anyway, tonight is the night that I quit. The Saints game started: And wait! Jacque Jones just hit a walk-off homer in the bottom of the eleventh, and the Twins win 6-5 over the Chicago Whitesox. The Twins were down 5-1 after 4 innings. The bullpen took over, throwing 7 2/3 innings of scoreless relief, and then Jones did his thing. The win keeps us in a tie for first, which is always fun. So anyhow, the Saints game was scheduled for 7:05. The first pich was thrown out at 8:45. The culprit? Rain. Currently, the Saints lead 1-0, though I don't know if Cory Harris has extended his hitting streak. I hope he has. I mean, it would be nice.
And now, back to politics. Mark Dayton, the MN state moron, (senator) said one of the dumbest things that I have ever heard. He said, and I paraphrase, "I didn't want to vote for this, (the Medicaire drug benefit), because Congressmen get a better health plan then our seniors, and I don't think that its fair." He, of course, voted for the plan. Well Mark, most congressmen earn more money then most seniors, maybe they should live off Social Security? I mean, this is just another example of liberal wishy-washy and touchy-feely stupidness. Congressmen need the benefits, because more people want to kill them, and also, they are doing a lot more for this nation than most seniors. Hey, I bet you that Mark is stil taking those drugs.
The St. Paul Saints won a threatened-rain shortened game, which lasted just 7 innings. I don't know if Cory Harris extended his hitting streak, but I assume that he did, because the Saints did score 9 runs. The Twins lost, so now we are in a tie for first with the Royals. Andre Agassi won in 4 sets, 6-4, 6-0, 5-7, 6-4. Opinion is divided as to whether he will win the tournament. I think he will. No one else does.
In a recent California poll, Condoleeza Rice would whip Arnold Schwarzeneger (sorry I misspelled his name) in the GOP primary, and then whip any Democratic contenders. Condo 2008? As long as she keeps sounding smarter then the average Democrat, (which ain't hard) she should be our first woman president.
What's up with Glenn's comment about Condi? It is spelled Mac, not MAC. Anyway, have you heard the latest news about David Beckham? (If you have, just skip to the next paragraph.) Anyway, his 3 hour physical is going to be broadcast on live pay-per-view worldwide; think $19.95? Great money maker. Especially considering as they are going to have over 20 million viewers. If he passes his physical, then 90,000 crazy Spaniards will crowd Real Madrid's stadium to watch him put on a jersey. That's like someone filming me putting on a shirt, and then grossing 10 million buckos over the weekend. Some people, as I said, need a life.
To more sports news. The Saint Paul Saints have won again, increasing their lead over Winnipeg to 4 games. Who knows, maybe we'll be back in the playoffs for the first time since 1997. I sure hope so. Okay then, I will write more tommorow, and remember, keep your fingers crossed for Andre.
In response to the comment by Glenn about Ariel Sharons favorite member of the Bush admin, get real. She is not geting elected. The Republican party is way too sexist for that to happen. Just kidding! Of course, we embrace everybody, even Mexican grocers. Meanwhile, Apple introduced the fastest computer in the world, and it can support up to 8 GB of memory. That is ridiculous. No one needs more then six. Anyway, it is beautiful. The bad news is that I wanted a new Powerbook, and seeing as I am not going to buy the model from two months back, I will just have to wait for a couple of months. I hope.
In sports news, the Packers strength and conditioning coach was just inducted into the US strength and conditioning hall of fame. Whoop de doo. The Saints game started about ten minutes ago, and I will keep you posted. Au Revoir.
Oh, by the way, Andre now has his path clear; no more Hewitt or Sampras.
Well then, now that the big weekend is over, we turn our attention to Monday, with the 6 AM start of Wimbledon, the 1 AM start of WWDC, where Steve Jobs will tell us what we already know, and, of course, another St. Paul Saints game. They won today, which is fun; it is always nice when you maintain a division lead.
St. Paul has always prided itself on its attendance. Their ballpark, though, only seats 6 or so thousand, while CanWest Global (Winnipegs) seats over 7000. This means that we can't possibly take over the attendance lead without them going on a 30 game slide; who knows? stranger things have happened. Hey, didn't Hilary Clinton get elected? In other political news, George W. Bush continued to lead in my informal polls; the way I see it, the path is clear for him to win. Did you know that only 4 Presidents had their vice-presidents elected right after their term ended? The last one? George H. W. Bush. Well then, I will write more Monday, acting, of course, as the QB.
Well, the Twins bats finally showed some power. For the fourth series in a row, the Twins scored eight or more runs in the final game of a series; while they went 3-1 in that time span, they went 5-8 in the 4 series. Thankfully, we remain a game ahead of the Royals, but the WhiteSox are charging up, and coming to the dome for a visit this week. In the first game, we have to put out a pitcher who has 7 losses and 3 wins, versus a 10 game winner who is one of the league leaders in Earned Run Average. Hopefully, he will have a letdown. The Saints were leading 9-6 when I last caught them, hopefully, they can continue to play good ball. Well then, until tonight,
Well, I would just like to say, in reference to the Twins, that even if you stink, as long as the team under you stinks even more, you are fine. Meanwhile, the Saints maintained a comfortable lead on Winnipeg, even though they lost, and I have one word for Buffalo: good pick. The Sabres drafted Thomas Vanek, the MVP of the frozen four who just happened to be on Minnesota. Hopefully, he will stay with us for a couple more seasons. Meanwhile, the Wild picked up some right winger who should help improve our streaky offense. Meanwhile, talking about streaks, there has been no bigger team for them then Twins, first losing all their games, then winning all of them, and then losing like there's no tommorow. Whatever, we will still win someday. I hope. Well then, let us say "Au Revoir!"
Well, it seems like Apple has done it again. Read this article, and you will wish that you really had no life. Then you would have seen this coming.
MMMMPPPHHHHAAAHAHAHAHAHAAA!! Aha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha haaaaa haa haa ha ha! They just... Ahee hee hee hee heh heh ha ha ha! Aha ha! Oh, man, that's... HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!! Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee! (sniffle) Ha ha ha ha ha haa haaaa! Ha ha ha! Ha.
Hee hee. Heh.
Aheh.
mmmmmmppppphhhhhhHAAAAAAHAHAHAHA!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Hee hee hee hee... HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE! Aha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha. Aheh. Heh.
Okay, all better now.
If you don't know what just caused us to unload a mouthful of 18-hour-old mocha all over our Cinema Display and keyboard, you need to keep your ear a little closer to the ground, because you're missing out on comedy gold, people. Faithful viewer John Duffin was the first of many, many people to inform us that the proverbial cat is out of the bag. Indeed, said cat is not only out of the bag, it also ate said bag, which means it's pretty much as out of that particular bag as it gets. Yes, kiddies, Power Mac G5 specs have been leaked, and we think you'll judge the source to be pretty reliable as far as these things go: it was Apple.
"The devil you say!" Yessirree-Bob, people; apparently if you had been so lucky as to have been cruising the Apple Store between, say, 11:30 PM and midnightish Eastern time last night, you might have noticed that the specs for the Power Mac G4 suddenly seemed a little, well, unfamiliar. Scads of screenshots flooding our inbox show the Power Mac G4's listed specs as including "1.6 GHz, 1.8 GHz, or Dual 2 GHz PowerPC G5 Processors; up to 1 GHz processor bus; up to 8 GB of DDR SDRAM; Fast Serial ATA hard drives; AGP 8x Pro; three PCI or PCI-X expansion slots; three USB 2.0 ports; one FW800, two FW400 ports; Bluetooth & AirPort Extreme ready; optical and analog audio in and out." Maybe it's just us, but that doesn't sound like any Power Mac G4 we've ever seen.
Apple has since rectified that minor inaccuracy (after apparently pulling the whole store offline in a mad panic), and the Apple Store now reports Power Mac G4 specs more in line with the universe we're used to inhabiting. But if you missed seeing the anomaly yourselves, you can visit MacRumors to check out one of many screenshots we expect to pepper the 'net over the course of the next day or so. Suddenly the question of what might be in those Big, Mysterious Boxes doesn't seem nearly as urgent, does it? We admit it, we feel a little bad for Steve. The man does like his surprises, after all, and we can't help feeling like this is going to spoil one of his great joys in life. But heck, we're sure he's got more surprises up his sleeve. If nothing else, he's got all weekend to learn how to do some card tricks.
So, basically, yeah, that's the whole story. Either someone at Apple screwed up enormously and his raggedly decapitated corpse is even now slowly cooling on a pike in Steve's office as the iCEO himself picks bits of neck vein out from between his teeth, or someone managed to compromise Apple's web servers and upload the G5 specs image as a gag. Either way, it's pretty darn embarrassing for Apple. Really, the only other possibility we can think of is that Apple leaked the image intentionally to throw us all off the track as the Stevenote rapidly approaches, and really, even we aren't paranoid enough to believe that.
(Leans forward dramatically) ...Or are we? Da da da dummmmm!
Professional test
The following short quiz consists of 4 questions, and it will tell you
whether you are qualified to be a professional. Scroll down for the correct
answer. The questions are NOT that difficult.
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close
the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an
overly complicated way.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, "Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the
refrigerator?" (Wrong Answer)
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the
elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the
repercussions of your previous actions.
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend
except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just
put him in there. This tests your memory. OK, even if you did not answer the
first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your
true abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross but crocodiles inhabit it. How do you
manage it?
Correct Answer: You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the Animal
Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals
they tested got all questions wrong. But many preschoolers got several
correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the
theory that most professionals have the brains of a four year old.
So, do you like it? The best way to get back at me for making you look like a fool is to read it to your spouse or boss, then they will have an excuse to divorce or fire you, (possible both) and that should be fun. Enjoy yourself! And I will write more later.
It has come to my attention that some lower life form (he doesn't like baseball) has insulted one of the 2 greatest inventions of all time (aside, of course, from the donut). What I am referring to is (drumroll please) the Mac. (How about some of that Space Odyssey 2001 music now; you know, da duh.) So anyway, all I have to say is that any non-believers should check out Apples' website on Monday at 12:15 CT, or better yet, go to your nearest Apple Store to watch the Stevenote live. Here in MN, there will be over 100 blue-blooded Republicans cheering as Steve Jobs saves the world--yet again--from communism with the introduction of the G5, the fastest personal computer in the history of manned space flight.
Incidentally, I recently picked up a magazine that is published here in the Twin Cities, called The Rake. In it, there is an advertisement froma group called "Secede from Starbucks Nation." What do you think? I fully agree with them, after all, Starbucks is way too pretentious. What's up with "Double Grand Mocha Latte," or whatever the call it. Give me a good Dunn Bros. brew anyday. Well, enjoy the Stevenote, and lets see if the Twins pitching can actually do its job, and pitch! Let us not say goodbye, but as the French put Au Revoir! (that, by the way, is from Jane Austens' "Pride and Prejudice".
It’s “Brush with Fame” Night at Midway. The team hopes to hands out 5,000 toothbrushes, toothpaste, water and a rinse cup in an attempt to break the Guinness World record for simultaneous brushing of teeth. The current record of 3,002 people was set in Germany in 2002.
Some people just have way too much time and money on their hands. Meanwhile, David Beckhamwas traded to Real Madrid yesterday. Manchester United really messed up here, and if you keep on reading, I will explain why. Originally, they intended to sell him to Barcelona FC. Nothing wrong with that. When a team makes an agreement and then backs out of it, that is not a good sign. Also, it'll set English soccer back to the middle ages. While Beckham may have horrendous style, he represented a new type of English player, one that was graceful and beloved by most other fans. He will probably not even start consistently at Madrid, which is not only a waste of hie talents, but also will probably make him grow lazy. English football fans definitely have something to complain about, aside from the fact that they didn't win it all this year. Well, I guess he and Alex Ferguson didn't really get along very well, but there is a simple solution. Fire the manager! They do it all the time to perfectly good ones here, just to satisfy some overpaid jerk of a basketball or baseball athlete. Well, that's all for now, and remember the best way to spoil a liberals day; smile and work hard. I will be doing one of those; can you guess which? Soronora
Well, it seems like I picked the wrong night to go to a game. The Saints evened up their series with Fargo Moorhead 9-2, and stayed 3 games ahead of the Northerners from Winnipeg. The Twins continued their pathetic run, giving up 12 runs in just one inning, losing 14-7. They had had a 3-1 lead before the bottom of the sixth. In football news, the Packers released one of their many quarterbacks, which is probably a good thing. Besides, he was from Northwestern, which is one of the evil sister schools in the Big Ten beside Minnesota and Wisconsin. We had another BBQ tonight, and I put an apple wrapped in tin foil when the meat was finished. It tasted great; at least the part that remained in the foil did. The rest exploded all over the coals, leaving its remains together with the groundbeef and BBQ sauce. It will be a pain to clean that up. So then, that concludes another great episode of "Nothing else to do, so why not read him?" referring, of course, to me. That's right, Greenmantle. Oh, by the by, I just finished reading the book of that name, by John Buchan. You should too, you will like it. I hope.
So, another day rolls around, and where am I? In the basement, of course, where the tempreture is below 95 degrees and my beloved iMac resides. Actually, it's not that beloved anymore, what with all the rumors flying around about now Powerbooks coming in on the 23 of June. That's just like 6 days away. Remember, Apple is based on the West Coast, so it isn't even breakfast time until 11:00 ET. Which means a SteveNote at 2:00 ET, or 1:00 Central. Ah, the joys of living where MNF starts at 8:00, and you can watch football starting at 12:00 on Sundays. West of us, it's just ridiculous. Imagine having to start eating nachos and franks at 10:00 in the morning. Yuck! Well anyway, enjoy yourself before they take over the world. Who you ask? The French, sorry, I mean the Franks.
Today, I went to a Saints game. It was fun, except for the last frame. The Saints fell behind 2-0 early, but battled back to tie it at two by the seventh. It remained knotted a a deuce a piece before Fargo-Moorhead scored seven times to put the St. Paul team down for good. Not even my rally-cap helped. Actually, It got a two out walk, but then the next batter grounded right back to the pitcher. Whatever, we still lead by 3 games over the Canucks from Winnipeg. Speaking of leading by three games, that's all the Twins are doing now, as they fall 9-8 to KC. They showed some spirit though, slogging back after falling behind 8-0, scoring eight times in the last 3 innings. But Eddie couldn't hold the floodgates, and the Twins lost. Hey, at least maybe this will make his agent not ask for so much. Look at Mondays Peanuts, it is very enlightening, as are most of them. Oh yeah, we had a BBQ before the game. Nothing went right with it, bu the food still tasted good and burnt, which is how I like it. Well then, Au Revoir
I wish to apologise to the Saints, they beat the stuffing out of the Sioux Falls Canaries today 9-1, at the Birdcage in Sioux Falls. (Cute name, no?) Anyway, though their website isn't updated on weekends, (think alchohol) it is still pretty fun.
So, is everyone enjoying fathers day? All having a hunky-dorky time , making barbeques, getting corny cards from your kids, etc? Well anyway, after a pathetic loss to the money-losers from from Phoenix, I at least have Michael Schumaker to fall back to. At least he didn't lose the F1 race in Canada. Probably had something to do with all the other drivers getting SARS. Or something like that. Anyway, enjoy the Saints 2-1 lead while it lasts, and remember that the meaning of life is to bang the rocks together guys.
There is an interesting article at packers.com which details the Packers economic growth. They made a heck of a lot of money, and yet they are still complaining. Whatever. Anyway, the goal for Packers fans is that the packers should spend the money in the hopes that we can get back into the Superbowl. The salary-cap severly hampers that push, but maybe we should do an under-the-table deal like the Timberwolves did with Joe Smith, then nobody will be happy. Smith cost the Wolves years in development, and a lot of money. Well anyway, have a good Saturday night, even though the Saints and Twins lost.
Smith has been assigned jersey No. 11. It is pronounced "kuh-BEE-suh uh-KEE-lee marr-uh-DOO-foo."
I mean, come on, what kind of name is that? It is almost as bad as Kabeer Gbaga Biamla, but at least he has cool sounding initials, KGB. Sounds kind of Russsian, huh? Anyway, the Packers now have 5 QB's vieing to be Brett Favre's backup. The way I see it, we can't lose. I mean of course we can, but GB is better off then Daunte Culpepper and the Vikings.
Can someone explain this to me?
Latino's Support President Bush's Nominee for
Federal Bench, Poll Shows
The non-profit, Committee for Justice working with Opiniones Latinas has found
that an overwhelming majority support the President's nomination of Miguel
Estrada to be a Federal Judge despite repeated Democrat filibusters and
obstruction the Senate.
The poll found that:
* 94% believe it is important that Latinos are represented on the federal bench
* 94% believe every nominee to a federal court deserves an up-or-down vote
* 88% believe the Senate should vote on the Estrada nomination
* 87% believe Miguel Estrada should be confirmed to the DC Circuit Court of
Appeals
Estrada has received the highest possible rating from the American Bar
Association and is supported by 16 Hispanic organizations including LULAC, the
Hispanic Bar Association, The Latino Coalition, and the Mexican American Grocers Associaton.
Who cares if the Mexican American Grocers Association supports him? I mean please, people, how many are there? 10, 15 thousand? Out of like 300 million people in this here great country. Whatever. More later.
The Twins won again, and now lead the AL Central by 5 games. They got 18 hits, and hits 15 in a rout of Colorado which saw Twins pitcher Kenny Rogers pick up his 150th career win. Mazel Tov to him. Of course, only five of those have come with the Twins, but he has the best record right now of the Twins staff, which is pretty pathetic. Anyway, we are in 1st which is all that counts. In football, Packers linebacker Hardy Nickerson retired, which really stinks, because he was really good. In hockey, Jacques Lemaire won his second Adams Trophy, awarded to the best coach in the NHL. Earlier in the post-season, he had been named best coach by The Sporting News, and Doug Riseborough, MN's GM, was named best GM. See ya!
Anyway, all the teams I was rooting for won. Twins, Saints, Nets, D-Backs, Red Sox, Blue Jays, Astros all won. The AL East is a mess, with the top four teams all within 7 or 8 games of each other. The Al Central is starting to solidify, with the Twins now leading by 4.5, courtesy of a 7-4 win, and the Nets tied up their series, ensuring that it will go at least to a game seven. The Yankees got no-hit for the first time at home since the fifties, and it was done by 6 Houston pitchers, an MLB record. ESPN got ir right by making this a nationally televised game, as most of the baseball matchups that they do show are boring. The really exciting things usually happen when nobody is watching. Fortunately for Disney though, this was a great game. Checkout todays Peanuts cartoon, as it is hilarious, and www.appleturns.com, for its brilliant satire. It is usually good, but todays episode was extremely funny. At least I thought so. Politics continues to be boring. Don't get me wrong, I am a passionate Republican, and fought for Dole and Bush, but this Medicaire stuff is so boring. As in how a valley-girl would say it. You know, as in quickly, with the emphasis on boring. Anyway, I won't be eligible for Medicaire for another 50 or so years anyway, and it will be so bankrupt by then that it won't even be around! Anyway, when the personal attacks start coming, I will heat up. Read me tommorow, Greenmantle.
The St. Paul Saints of the Northern League found a way to win despite giving up a 2 run double in the top of the ninth. Their catcher hit a bases loaded 2 out single into right field at Midway. Earlier, the Saints had pitched out of a similiar situation when they got two easy outs to get the Joliet Jackhammers to leave the bases loaded. Meanwhile, the Twins continued to stink.
After the disappointing Stanley Cup final, the Saints pulled out a great win. I mean it wasn't that great, but we beat Joliet 5-2 which is always fun. I mean beating Joliet. Whatever.
I come home, and the Twins lead 4-3 over the worst baseball team in the majors, the San Diego Padres. In the bottom of the eighth. And then they lose, 9-4. How pathetic is that. Well anyway, at least the Saints beat Schaumburg 4-3. Some teams just know how to hold a lead, Huh?
Proving again that the Packers are a blue-colar team, they went bowling, a blue-collar sport if there ever was one.
Four years ago, on the Friday of his first June mini-camp as head coach of the Green Bay Packers, Mike Sherman surprised his players when he cancelled practice, boarded the team on buses and sent them bowling.
In the years that followed, Sherman arranged team trips to play paintball and golf -- both times on Fridays in June mini-camp -- so that by this spring, veteran players expected that they would have another mini-camp fieldtrip. They just didn't think it would be Wednesday.
"That even got (the veterans)," eighth-year guard Marco Rivera said. "He kind of surprised us. He switched it up."
Sherman announced the special outing at the team's 9 a.m. meeting, and before everyone was bused to Ashwaubenon Bowling Alley, a draft was held to separate players, coaches and other football personnel into 28 competitive foursomes.
Captains were assigned based on their tenure in the league, starting with center Frank Winters, approaching his 17th NFL season, and ending with fourth-year veteran Steve Warren.
The purpose of Wednesday's event -- like the three before it -- was to build team chemistry, something that takes extra nurturing in an NFL where roster turnover is prevalent.
"Every year is a new team," Rivera explained. "Nobody really knows each other. We see them in practice, but we don't know their names, or we know their names, but we don't know who these guys are.
"Coach brings us down here, we bowl and you see some of the younger guys with the older guys. They're cheering, high-fiving. We get to know them. They get to know us.
"That helps to build (chemistry), and come (training) camp in July, we know them and they're a part of the team."
In that spirit, there was 10th-year veteran running back Lamar Smith drafting wide receiver/kick returner Antonio Chatman and offensive lineman Marcus Spriggs, all three players having been with the team for less than a week.
And there was sixth-year Packer Mike Wahle selecting newcomer Grey Ruegamer, while newcomer Al Harris took second-year Packer Najeh Davenport.
The draft wasn't limited to players, so quarterback Brett Favre used his first pick -- the second overall behind Winters -- on offensive coordinator Tom Rossley. Kicker Ryan Longwell drafted new special teams coach John Bonamego. Linebacker Na'il Diggs selected new linebackers coach Mark Duffner.
And together everyone bowled, laughed, competed and grew a little closer, just like Sherman had hoped.
Said safety Darren Sharper, who had fellow safety Marques Anderson and defensive coordinator Ed Donatell among his foursome, "I think after today there will be a lot more close relationships with one another on the team."
And perhaps, too, some respect for hidden talent.
Drafted by fellow tight end Tyrone Davis with the eighth overall pick, David Martin proved to be the most talented bowler of the group Wednesday, rolling a 210 that was near his all-time best of 236.
Still learning the game, Martin said he likes to bowl regularly in his downtime and even has his own bowling ball.
Another player who likes to roll the rock is rookie linebacker Shantee Orr, who wasn't selected in the 2003 NFL Draft, but was a surprise first-round pick (14th overall) by defensive back Bryant Westbrook in the bowling draft.
A big fan of the sport, Orr said he likes to bowl as much as twice a week in the offseason and was even heckled by roommate Eric Powell earlier in the week when he was caught watching a women's professional bowling event on TV.
On this day, a "rusty" Orr bowled a 170 that was well shy of his lifetime best of 247, but still better than most.
Apparently not an avid bowler, for example, is offensive line coach Larry Beightol. Sharper tabbed him the worst in the group, and even Rivera had trouble sticking up for his position coach.
"All I know is, I looked over one time and Larry Beightol was sizing up, threw his hand back and the ball went the other way," Rivera said. "He almost killed some guys sitting down, so he's dangerous."
Not so risky is the event itself, which seemed to give both veteran and rookie players many reasons to smile.
Could it be? Oh, it be; it's time once again for everyone's favorite guessing game, "Product or Pipe Dream?" Yes, folks, you too can win fabulous prizes simply by guessing whether the latest round of alleged "spy photos" are genuine contraband snapshots of unannounced Apple products, or just the contrivance of some sad individual with a bootleg copy of Photoshop and way too much time on his hands. Well, okay... we lied about the "fabulous prizes" part. But hey, at the very least it's a great way to kill an afternoon at work, thus contributing still further to the rampant decline of productivity and the eventual collapse of civilization as we know it. Everybody wins!
So here's the deal: a site called Top Technical Tips (no, we've never heard of them either) recently posted some photos of what is allegedly the box for some sort of Apple "thing" called Pal. The box boasted a green stylized lightbulb graphic, the Pal product name, and a smattering of marketingspeak that was cut off in the photo, but includes such interesting phrases as "Green Light the Internet," "take your life on the road," and "Forget disks. Forget syncing." So whaddayathink? Some new Apple software product that lets you access your Desktop from any Mac via the Internet? Or some hoax intended to generate a zillion hits to an otherwise obscure new web site? Answer correctly and this lovely KitchenAid 5-Speed Blender can be yours!
No, actually, we're lying about the blender, too, but it's still fun to play. The photos vanished (ahem) from TopTechTips, but several kind people in the MacRumors forums posted links to their own copies, so you can still judge for yourself. Personally, we think they look nice, but they still smell about as fishy as Mrs. Paul after a long day of deboning flounder. We're not buyin' it.
We could easily be wrong, of course (in fact, we thought we were wrong once before, but we were mistaken), and given the latest update at TopTechTips (culled from the MacRumors forums, we gather), we hope we are. After all, who wouldn't want a "small wireless device with a touch sensitive screen, which can remotely login to your desktop Mac" with a "pen-based input method" that's positioned as a "Mac companion" that's "suitable for surfing the web on the move"? There have been those rumors of a new Apple "digital lifestyle device" coming soon, you know. So could it be true? Could Pal indeed be a "handy means of accessing your Desktop and the Internet wherever you are"? Get it right and you could go home with this invigorating Acupressure Foot Spa!
But not really.
I went to a website to take my OS personality test. I am slackware Linux. Take it, at BBspot.com.
The Saints won. Okay? My baseball world is still alive. Barely. I shall write more tommorow, Vis a Vis Gen. Macarthur. I.e. 1944